Reflections

I know. It's been a while. The past few months have been torturous to say the least. Many times, I had a Zoolander "Who am I?" moment and still struggle being away from "real life", while still having to deal with the family issues and decision-making power that a head-of-household has, in addition to school.

In the past few months I have learned that:

1. I am my parents' daughter, first and foremost. I am the eldest child. I am part of a close-knit family that I can never escape, regardless of distance. Whether I want them or not, family-affecting decisions are my burden alone.

2. I have the greatest friends in the world. They know the struggle, and I know, if push comes to shove, they will to be there scheming with me as if we're back to being young and carefree. (They are also the reason why I was so tired from my Spring Break... too much fun... great talks... too many laughs.)

3. My mentors (back home & here in the Midwest) are awesome. I got lucky in this regard. They want me to succeed just as much as my friends do.

4. The Midwest isn't so bad. You just gotta get used to it.

5. I have learned that I have to do business with the personality that I have--being obnoxiously loud is not how I related to my clients pre-B school, it doesn't have to be how I relate to clients now. Being sincere goes a long way.  

So a rundown of the random things currently in my mind:

1. Baseball. Yep. Said it.
2. My godbaby will be 6 months in a couple of days. 
3. A lot my friends/cousins/classmates are getting married, and therefore, I need fancy clothes. And shoes.
4. I need a job. Loans, bleh.
5. The weather here is more fickle than the weather back home.
6. I don't enjoy SBTB as much as I used to (particularly Screech and Slater... was Screech always so stalker-ish and was Slater always such a douche?). It makes me very sad.

Fin.

Basketcase

I wrote a post a few days back and after re-reading it I decided that I didn't make sense (even to me), so I canned it. I guess that's what happens when have you stress and homesickness hit you at the same week. With the start of baseball season--the home team, its annual FanFest on Saturday (yeah, I know it's stupid that I use a sport to gauge parts of my mood) and the mark of being away from home for 6 months, my energy level has been nonexistent and my thoughts/spirit have been back home... not a good deal if you have 18 graduate units.

Rock 'n Roll Proletariat

Beyonce's Birth Lap of Luxury (via Yahoo!)

I don't know what it is about this article but it boils me to no end. I understand that she is a superstar and that she is concerned for the welfare of her child, but covering security cameras in a hospital is not only a liability, but also, by definition, makes the hospital unsecured. It is not just famous kids that get kidnapped--normal people's kids go missing all the time. And psychos, particularly ones who are drawn to newborns, love to fester around nurseries (please see, Babies Stolen from their Beds via msnbc.com and National Center for Missing and Exploited Children). The rates have dramatically decreased over the years--all due to surveillance at nurseries and pediatric floors.

If they wanted an "experience", why didn't they bring the hospital to them?! Employ a special team from across the nation, and have it where you could fully control the environment. People might argue that she needed to be at the hospital since she was receiving a c-section, but my money is on the procedure being elective. This activity of hers also negates the charitable works that she's done over the years. Stopping children's hunger = important, but giving medical personnel and parents full access to these children who need care = not important?

The thing that probably bothers me most is that father trying to see his two premature babies--hospitals, if you had a clue to what insurances actually reimbursed you, you (yes, I'm personifying hospitals) would know that those two preemie babies would equate in more than $2M in revenue while Blue Ivy gained you a measily $1.3M. If the hospital looked at revenue per square footage, they would see that those preemies rake in even more money than the Carter child.

I don't know... I guess I just don't like hospitals treating patients like shit.

P.S. I still like their music, but this has definitely dampened anything they have to say about raising the poor's status in our society. It's just a little too, "Everyone is equal, but some are more equal than others" for me.

Auld Lang Syne

I have never spent my New Year's away from home or family. You may call that boring. I call it lucky.

I was always told that you're supposed to start the year the way you want to end it. Particularly this year, I wanted to be home with my parents, because in all seriousness, how many more do I have of these moments?

May your 2012 be filled with awesome moments, love and peace. May your battles bring knowledge and strength, and may your successes create positive change all around you.

I'm on to you, 2012. I shall approach you cautiously.

Happy New Year! Be safe. Good health. Much love.

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays

I am broke. I am unemployed. But I am home.

Absence does make the heart grow fonder. And as much as I hate being away from all my family and friends, being away made me stronger. I know that I can live alone if I have to. I know that I can strive for things that some people only dream of. I know that I can survive.

I arrived at home two Thursdays ago with a care package waiting for me (thank you!) and seafood. =] I also arrived with a horrible allergic reaction to the antibiotics that were prescribed to me for my eczema. =P So many lessons learned this semester.

25% complete. 2 more weeks of vacation, then back to the daily grind.